If you are dreaming of crystal blue waters, island adventures and that true Moana experience that Tahiti is for you, so good job you made the right choice.
You're going to fly in Fa'a'ā International Airport in Papaate. When you land you'll most likely descend the pull up stairs. Meaning as you approach the cabin door you'll smell Tahiti before you see it without a window in between you. The smell is warm, sweet and tropical. You can smell hope, excitement and wonder. It's very cool and a great introduction to French Polynesia.
As you walk towards the terminal to cross through their customs agency, you'll begin to hear the sweet sounds of island Ukulele played by huge Polynesian dudes with their signature tribal tattoos and flowered button down shirts.
Immediately you want to get a cocktail in your hand and light a vacation dart. Unfortunately you can't smoke in the terminal, but just wait because you definitely can when you pass customs and wait for your cab. If you're staying on the main island and spending some days in the capital then I recommend you actually rent a vehicle from the airport.
Definitely get your car rental in Tahiti from the airport, and make sure you confirm the day before you leave that you have a reservation. I saw a lot of people who showed up and were told there were no cars available for them. Its a real bummer to have to wait, get a cab to your hotel or AirBnb, and go back when a car is available.
There is a lot to see on the island, so driving around is the best way to see it. Get a convertible or something sick, because it's way more fun than a boring eco car.
You'll probably land pretty late so there won't be much available to eat, however if you hear some unbelievable singing coming from a bar, go there. The Polynesians got pipes, these folks can sing. Also, I don't know the proper term for it so excuse my ignorance, but don't be shocked when you see the prevalence of ladyboys there. Anyways this will also be the best place to get late night eats, think fish, coconut broth and fried stuff.
On your first day I recommend you actually leave the island and take the ferry to Mo'orea an island close by. Mo'orea is essentially a rural basically uninhabited island with unbelievable resorts. Think boardwalk rooms surrounded by coral reefs.
You can pick up booze and darts from a store and bring them to your hotel room. Another move that will save you money and make sure you have a good time.
Tip everybody you see, they will love it. And if you speak French that's even better. On this island there are lots of stray dogs that will follow you around if you give them food. They are cute as heck but won't sleep in your room with you for some reason. Maybe it's because I tried to give them a shower but whatever.
Make sure you don't just stay at your resort, rent a buggy and do a tour of the island. It's one road and you can stop at all the cool vacation dart spots without having to be on someone else timeline.
There's a super chill juice factory that makes alcoholic juices that taste like breakfast smoothies. If you're a vacation darts fan, then this probably will be your Tahitian breakfast smoothie. Buy merch from them, stickers etc everybody is so nice.
TBH I would avoid Bora Bora. Why should you avoid Bora Bora? Because it is very touristy and very commercial and therefor very expensive and you can get all the same scenery, vibes and food at less expensive and just as cool islands. The only bad thing is you technically can't say "I've been to Bora Bora" I can say that, and it's pretty cool but it's not everything.
What to do when you get to the main island of Tahiti. First if you smoke weed on vacation as well as vacation darts ask for a "Stick Mille" pronounced "Stick Mill" the locals will know what you are talking about. Just be careful who you ask because even the cops are tatted head to toe making them look like chill people and not cops.
Another thing to keep in mind, and this was in 2021 so I'm not sure anymore, but you can't buy booze or beer on weekends. So plan ahead people! Why can't you buy beer in Tahiti on weekends. I think it was a Covid rule that is clearly stupid and out of date.
Some of the main attractions on the main island are:
Pointe Venus
The place where Captain James Cook first landed and introduced Christianity and thus started the beginning of colonization.
Fa'aruma'i Waterfalls
Very cool story of a princess and prince who fell in love but parents were not so chill about it. Somebody was a wizard and turned people into waterfalls. Go check out the blog post about that.
Teahupoo
When you think of the perfect surf wave, you are thinking of this place. Go check it out it's absolutely incredible to see all the people in the water like ants on a mound. Chasing waves and catching vibes at the highest level. They also have great black sand beaches that you need to check out.
In conclusion when visiting Tahiti there is so much to do. As long as you are wearing super cool vacation clothes that are made well and to amplify your vacation, you're in a good spot. Since it's a French island, people smoke darts, its not taboo, it's well enjoyed by everyone. So enjoy your vacation darts, enjoy your awesome vacation apparel, enjoy the good times you'll have.
You're in Tahiti after all, on the other side of the globe, away from all your issues and problems. Here money doesn't count so spend it. Calories don't count so eat the food. And darts don't count so smoke vacation darts.